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THOUGHTS FROM THE RABBI

A FATHER’S TALLIT

I would like to share some very private thoughts that I had during the First Day Shavuot morning Service. I think these thoughts are especially relevant to all those with children overseas and there are so many of us.

Near the end of the Service we reached the Birchat Cohanim—the Priestly Blessing. A highlight of each Festival, it was first said by Aharon the original Cohen Gadol (High Priest) 3,300 years ago. Now his male descendents bestow this uplifting blessing, adding to the specialness of the day.

The children came streaming in from Children’s Service to stand under their fathers’ Tallit. Two of my sons stood under my Tallit as we were about to begin. My youngest daughter chose to stand nearby under the “Chuppah” that a few of the younger men hold up for those children whose father’s are not fortunate enough to be in Shul to experience this moment with their children.

The Chazzan began the traditional chanting of the blessing, with our Cohanim repeating word for word, punctuated by the community singing a wordless tune before the end of each blessing.

Yivarechicha Hashem V’yishmarecha…. May G-d bless you and keep watch over you.

My mind momentarily wandered from the Blessing and I thought of invincibly extending my Tallit to embrace my young daughter as well.

Then, the thought occurred to me, “There are no limits to how far a Tallit can reach invincibly. Why not extend it to include my older daughter, standing with tens of thousands at the Kotel in Jerusalem after studying Torah in the Holy City straight through the night until daybreak?”

The walls of our Shul fell away and the stones of our Jerusalem wall merged with the stones of the Kotel and the voice of our Cohens blended with the voices of the hundreds of Cohens who were saying the same words of the Birchat Cohanim at the Western Wall. The Tallit extended to Jerusalem.

But why stop there? What about my oldest son in Kiryat Gat, Israel? Why not extend the Tallit to him, and the children that he would be gathering together to hear the Ten Commandments read from the Torah that morning? So the other side of the Tallit stretched to that modest city, some 50 kilometres southwest of Jerusalem.

Ya’air Hashem Panav Ailecha Veechuneka…. May G-d make his presence enlighten you and grant you grace.

All of us were wrapped in aura of the spiritual purity of the white Tallit. The white strings represented Ahavat Hashem - the love of G-d that they were imbibing in that rarefied environment. The darker stripes of the Tallit were a reminder of the Biblical blue thread that our Sages tell us resembled the blue of the Mediterranean Sea near Israel, that resembled the blue of the sky, that resembled the blue of Hashem’s Throne, inculcating a reverence and fear for the Almighty.

Yisa Hashem Panov Ailecha V”yasem Lecha…

The white and blue of the Tallit strings describe, not only our relationship to G-d, but enwrapping the children, also embody our hopes and fears for them.

The pure white is parental love and our pride in what that they are doing; they have chosen to be in the very best place for a young adult, developing intellectually, socially and spiritually in the Land of Israel. Our society confuses making a living with making a life. However, we are confident that wherever life may take them, they will, PG, have the life skills, intellectual ability, character and depth to truly succeed in life and to be happy. These are qualities that they don’t teach you in Harvard Business School or in any other university.

Intermingled with the white are the darker shades. Yes, there is sadness that they are not here and we are not able to see them each day, though we do speak often.

There is also the fear for their safety in a part of the world that is viewed as particularly unpredictable, though in reality, statistically, it is not worse, and in fact better, than many perceived “safe havens”.

Another of the darker shades is the fact that they must make decisions, large and small, often requiring a degree of life experience and insight that is beyond their years. What jobs to take or what friendships are beneficial and which are harmful. Even small things, such as where to spend Shabbat and where not or when to travel to the West Bank and when is it not prudent. We can merely guide and give input from a distance. Usually, they ultimately make the decisions. This is at a time of their lives when many of their peers experience an extended toddler hood, with each move micro-managed by parents or every whim indulged.

Experience though teaches that in the long-run a large degree of independence in the right environment is best for a young person and the darker shades transform to lighter ones.

….Shalom.— May G-d direct His providence toward you and grant you peace.

The Birchat Cohanim has ended with a promise and a blessing: Hashem Himself will look after them and we will have peace including peace of mind.

The Tallit is lowered. It no longer encompasses the children, either those that are here or those that had momentarily been encompassed by the far reach of the Tallit. But the effect of the blessing lingers on until the next Yom Tov.